Beer and Loathing in Pittsburgh, PA

The drive up is, as usual, filled with psychopaths and miscreants: degenerates and testaments against the American driving education system. And I have to drive myself this time, to boot. I detour by way of House of 1000 Beers for obvious reasons, as it becomes apparent that my phone has not only autonomously drained its battery while charging, but overheated itself in doing so. Fascinating.

I pick up a bottle of Angel's Share, Fegley's Bourbon Barrel Insidious (which I drink later—it is indeed insidious but also pretty good; with a trace of bitter oak finish, plenty of bourbon and chocolate, and a solid stouty backbone), as well as a Jolly Pumpkin Maricaibo Especial and three small bottles of Evil Twin's The Cowboy, which until recently came in either big bottles, or not at all (more commonly the latter). Cowboy is expensive, but great smoke flavor while maintaining a sessionable ABV.

I wander around Shadyside, Pittsburgh, attempting to follow some of the most ambiguous instructions I've ever received to "Walnut Street." I do not find Walnut Street. I do find a place with four restaurant/bars in close proximity. A pizza and beer dive that looks exceptionally normal, a trendy artisanal breakfast/sandwich joint that looks exceptionally closed, a bar/restaurant/lounge that looks exceptionally packed, and a 'bartini' (I wouldn't make this up) that looks exceptionally, exceptionally sleazy. I choose the packed one. Every local in the neighborhood can't be wrong.

Inside, the bartender is friendly, and as it turns out they are out of both pulled pork and pirogi (not 'brought to you by the letter P', evidently), my Founders Smoked Porter is free. It is also pretty good, kind of on par with Alaskan, but not quite at the level of Weyerbacher Fifteen in its prime. I tip egregiously for the complimentary beer and also the advice to dip the spicy chicken sandwich in the macaroni and cheese. The two foods, both great initially, combine to form something amazing. In my completely-out-of-place electric blue polo shirt, the word 'synergy' comes to mind, and I want to go play golf.

Shaking that urge from my head, I wander back to the hotel, past a store that has some interesting beers available, including a vintage Unibroue and what I believe to be a vintage He'Brew Jewbelation. I make a mental note to return. And a further note to find some pirogi. I have driven over 300 miles, after all.