It strikes me that there's a disturbing trend in payola memberships to skip airport security lines, which doesn't serve the interest of security at all, but definitely makes some cash and provides the 'haves' another opportunity to buy out of interacting with the 'nots,' short of flying into Aspen's own airfield, playground of private jets.
In security, my film is hand-checked at my request by a bearded agent who remarks, "How could I say no to someone with such an epic beard?"
The golf carts ferrying the morbidly obese/mobility impaired around the terminal evidently lack the horns so common at other airports, so the drivers whistle to alert travelers to their presence. Deciphering the tone and tune, I determine, is better left to ornithology.
Each announcement on the train between terminals is accompanied by a particular musical riff. How whimsically mnemonic.
Water emits from the fountain in a limp dribble into my leaky bottle, filling it only 20% full. Meanwhile, I am 100% certain that recent regulations are in fact a racket to sell bottles of water to air travelers.
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